Monday, July 1, 2024

Bradistan Sound


Sort of, kind of, "up yours Farage". 

Multicultural Britain, albeit at a somewhat coarse-vernacular, levelled-down level:

"yeah, Chicken Dhansak 

my wife will empty my ball sack"

Those lyrics in full: 

[Verse 1 - Shotta Shah]

I'm the party starter, paratha

Mixed starter, keema masala

Check what now? Meat bhuna

To the toilet, comes out straight through ya

Yeah, chicken dhansak

My wife will empty my ballsack

Me and the boys shot crack

Pull out my AK; tak-tak

Pakora, samosa, sheesh kebab, poppadom, pickle tray

Get out my way before I begin to spray

With the MAC-10 at the News At Ten

Lyrical G, Gareth Kelly

Two piece chicken and chips for 99p inside the party

[Verse 2 - Shotta Shah]

It's me; Shotta Shah Khan

Hold tight yes with the garlic naan

Smack Princess Pukka with the back of my palm

Sniff ten lines, that shit's haraam

Uncle will flip but I'll tell him keep calm

It's me and my boy Ali

Coming down Leeds Road at ninety

In my Chacha's Ferrari

I'm a taxi driver

Drive you to my yard for a fiver

Get a sucky off a prozzy for a bottle of cider

Up on the mic ah!

I said I took this bird to the Shimla Spice

Curry and rice on a Friday night

I got a vindaloo and it made me poo

Now I'm at Frame 2 with the Leeds road crew

See rap shows near Hollywood

Get tickets as low as $112

[Verse 3 - Halal Ham]

Stepped in the party, pass me the shisha

Drove to Bradford in my two-litre

Saw a peng ting, I'll go chat to her

Not going to Begum though like Shamima

I moved to this Auntie, Aunti went hanji

Then she went to go make me some handi

It's Shotta Shah and Kutta Khan and we go hard in Bradistan

A couple of apnas, a couple of goras

A couple of tings for a couple of pakoras

Uss bar kidda sohniye

And she's gonna take me home with her

Kasmeh bro it was mental

Spend my Eid monies on a rental

I was like "Boss who wants a Lambo?"

Popping bottles; Rubicon Mango

Shotta Shah is from Bad Boy Chiller Crew  and here's another BBCC track that references Chicken Dhansak 

What led me back to these was a more recent "Bradford Sound" track by MC Chippy

A real "Danelaw" look to most of the people in this video  - red hair, pale skin, narrow eyes

A Scandi-ness that recalls Die Antwoord, the whitest people who ever rapped - until BBCC + crews 

(although donkists the Blackout Crew were pretty pasty) 

This Chippy fella looks like a mash-up of Catweazle and Jimmy Savile 

Looking at these vids (and there's so many of them) I sometimes can't help picturing a post-apocalyptic tribe out of some Russell Hoban scenario....  mutant survivors who've reconstructed "civilization" using a handful of cultural fragments - in this case, a So Solid Crew DVD, a No Limit CD, singles by T2  and DJ Q... a Niche mix-tape pack ...  over the centuries the repeated gestures and references devolved into rote ritual, emptied of meaning, original referents long lost.... 

Hey look - an Irish branch of this bassline/rap fusion

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